One man's jacuzzi is another woman's nightmare....

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09 August

One man's jacuzzi is another woman's nightmare....

hi assmongers.

for those of you who actually read my blog and absorb its amazing content, you will know that i'm housesitting at my sista's out in the country. how much do i frickin love it here!!!!!! SWEET JEEZUS!! I LOVE IT!!!!

Story of why i'm an imbasole

(i made up that spelling so piss off)

Chapter 1

i have been dreaming about soaking my big fat smelly ass in their jacuzzi tub since i first laid eyes on it.(nice visual eh?) so, i fire it up, throw in the bubblies, figure i'll run out to feed freddy and eddy (THE KITTIES - PAY ATTENTION DAMMIT!) figuring the supershy little mofos won't make an appearance anyways, and i'll come back in to a steaming hot tub. well low and behold (lmfao, i sound like a frail little church lady whose teeth rattle when she talks!), the little stinkers (stinkers, thats one's for you helga ;)) came out to see me! i'm all happy, babytalking to the little kitties, lovin them to death. say goodnight in my koochie, koochie voice, stroll around the beautiful open space for a while, just soakin up the country life. come back in the house...hmmm...what the hell is that noise?...heart speeds up to an unnatural rate....oh oh...OH OH

THE FUCKIN JACUZZI TUB IS STILL RUNNING!!!

i run to the f-in bathtub, thinking i'm in some serious shit....

Insert: anticlimatic ending here.

tub didnt overflow. sorry fags, lame ending, but kickass story eh? lmao

Chapter 2

k, so lookin forward to the jacuzzi still right? u still reading??? get in, stretch out...aaaaaahhhhhhhh......hmmm...can't get quite right...hmmm....holy fuck this water is hot....hmmmm...what angle exactly are u supposed to lay in this mofo? ITS TOO FUCKIN LONG !! yeah, so i drown for a while, sweated till i stunk worse than i did when i first got in, turned on the jets and let them beat the piss out of me, slam me into the sides for a bit. got out. fuckin bubbles everywhere. i'm hot, sweaty, and just had a really traumatic drowning episode.

Morale of the Story

Jacuzzi tubs suck my ass.

23:06 | In Blog aufnehmen

Kommentare (18)

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	_finewine_58 schrieb: margie, A well tuned tub is an absolute delight! As with any watersport it's a;ways best to incorporate the buddy system! ;-) eboy 8 Okt.
	tak2sarah schrieb: ((((HUGS)))) spreading the love a bit late.....haven't been around..... }}}}BUTTERFLY KISSES{{{{ 11 Aug.
	mind_in_flight schrieb: who is the dancing fatboy??? i came here expecting i'd find a link to something like the numa numa guy....but "i see nusssssing!" 11 Aug.
	Darth-Viktorius schrieb: You are the coolest chick! hahahah laughed my ass off! 10 Aug.
	~~Will~~ schrieb: Hahahahaha! I've had a few hot tub horror stories myself. Anyway, just stopped by to tell you I just passed 10, 000 hits on my space. Come join the party. Az is topless!!!! 10 Aug.
	jade schrieb: OMG I am SO embarrased right now - I'm bellowing out loud!!! I HATE those freakin tubs!!! The bubbles are hell & last time I crawled out naked & totally heat prostrated & lay on the floor like a naked slug almost passed out/almost puked!!! rotfflmfao!!!!!! 10 Aug.
	-deadites- schrieb: I've never been too fond of hot tubs either.. I like to hit the water to be refreshed and not feel like someone's boiled supper! lol 10 Aug.
	mind_in_flight schrieb: hey, i forgot to ask you....are you doing az's "dirty blogger's 101"? 10 Aug.
	mind_in_flight schrieb: jacuzzi tubs are certainly not all they're cracked up to be. hot tubs with built in seats, so you know exactly where to place your ass....they're where it's at...fo sho! 10 Aug.
	Nuttyfunseeker6 schrieb: he he he Yeah, I never liked them myself!!! Too damn hot!! :) 10 Aug.
	tomorrows_edition schrieb: Nice story, with or without the vocab.......... 10 Aug.
	Greeneyedcat schrieb: Hey girl, just came to check out your porn, religion, ranting & up your stats, but I was sorely disappointed. ;-) That's a funny story! I have problems in Jacuzzis too. I mean, the GD jets, just point at one place, say...your lower back or your ass, right? So you try to move around to get the jets to hit other places (NO not there!!!) ......you know, mid-back, shoulders, etc. and you just end up looking spastic. Harumph. Oh well...enjoy the house anyway! Peace. Cat 10 Aug.
	b_c_k_h schrieb: well at least your hair didnt get sucked up in one of the jets!! you should do some birdwatching in the country tonite...lemme know if you see any big breasted bed thrashers!! 10 Aug.
	the_queen_of_this_castle schrieb: You are seriously funny. And no I didn't ask what part of Alberta, but thanks for the info anyway. have a super sunshiney day enjoy the hot tub jenn 10 Aug.
	Larry schrieb: I knew I should have checked on you on my way home last night. Maybe I better stop in tonight and make sure you're still alive. 10 Aug.
	MetJoeMac schrieb: Hubby and I had a jacuzzi episode once...no one told us only to put a FEW bubbles in. Needless to say, it was quite a mess once we turned the jets on! 10 Aug.
	vcw15 schrieb: you are such a dork....nice story margie....but really the tubs are better with 2 in them.....so next time give me a call as you get that wine. 10 Aug.
	michellabellabanana schrieb: lmfao. So we don't share an appreciation of jacuzzis. The difference is, I don't get in them. I just use them to be irresponsible with bubbles in hotels. Sorry it sucked ass. Chelle 9 Aug.

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